Journal de gingrins, 30 mai 19

Thank you all for the reminder that I’m the most important opinion in this journey. I have bought smaller clothes and that has been great. I am celebrating the things I can do now that I couldn’t. I feel like “myself” again with the weight gone and I know that I will keep going. I think really there is only one person I really want to notice and that’s my mom. She doesn’t see me every day and we haven’t seen each other at all for over a month. I’m having lunch with her today. We have a fraught relationship where I am constantly seeking her approval. I’m working on it with my therapist but I think seeing her today brought all my feelings of inadequacy to the front. I really do appreciate everyone’s comments though. It helps me temper my crazy thoughts and brings me back to reality and remember that I am doing awesome. Wish me luck with my mom! 

They notice!!! They are just envious that you took control of your life and made some necessary changes, while they know they need to do the same so they "hate you"! Not really ... but sorta.. we all get mad at ourselves when we aren't where we want to be.. so we avoid others that succeed..because then we look and compare ourselves and the guilt is doubled.. so we (sadly) don't want to recognize others for their achievements. Humans can be selfish! Congrats and keep it up...and >know< that they "know-tice"!  

So you’re losing weight for others? 

totally normal to want people to notice your achievements. also totally Normal to let your vanity be at least a little part of your motivation to look better. hell, if it didn't matter how you looked to other people then it wouldn't matter now would it. the truth is that it does matter to you, and that's just fine. keep on keeping on, and you'll be able to rub your new healthy bod in their face once your satisfied  

I don't know about your history with weight, but I spent 30+ years yo-yo my way from 200 to over 300. I didn't say anything about my goals because I didn't actually believe I would stick with it. When I kept losing weight after the initial 10% (28 lbs), my family and friends didn't say anything because they feared "breaking the spell." I'm also thinking that at work people started commenting when I stopped using the cane and handicapped parking. Mentioning that they noticed I was no longer using a cane was "safe". Talking to people about their weight is a tricky thing because there is so much emotion tied up in it. You may need to be the one to mention it first to give "permission" for people to even say anything.