Sorry if this is coming across as complaining.. I am not.. actually I have felt like that I have pulled thru my months of depression, and coming out of my stomach and chest flu...
Well I have not been recording what I have been eating lately.. due to being sick..Since early Friday morning, all I have been eating were crackers, ginger ale--yesterday I tested the waters by eating a bowl of chicken soup.. but that was a mistake--I had to go into work last night, there were administration crap, yes crap, that I had to get done-- no one really knows how to do it, except for me-- well they can figure it out but will take them longer than normal. I had missed two days of work, Due to Christmas and being sick- kind of stinks since if I do not work, I do not get paid for it. BUT on the other hand, it was good to relax between visits to my throne room.. I have slept so much-- Been having weird dreams though, not sure if it is the result of being sick, or just a lot on my mind-- oh well..
It is nearly 9 months (Jan 3rd) since I started this new journey.. and it is hard for me to believe that I have come this far in so short of a time. People have asked me if I felt any better-- well I try to explain to them that even though I have lost all of this weight in a short period of time, I feel like that I am like a frog in a pot of water, over a simmering flame.. I really have not noticed it. IN my mind's eye I still see myself as the 373.4 lb person. When I see myself in the mirror, I ofter ask Who is that stranger looking back at me. I can tell that I still see myself as that 373 lb person by the comments that I am even getting from my family.. bout how skinny my arms, hands and legs are (legs from my wife).. I look at them thinking that they are crazy...wonder how I can change that mental view of myself.. not sure!
Just to let you know.. once I get to my goal.. you are still stuck with me.. not planning on leaving the group!! :-D (Am I hearing a lot of "OH Man!" from the group ;-) )
I think it might help me a little bit, if I can see a difference in my blood pressure-- it is still kind of high-- yes I am taking blood pressure pills-- wish I can get off of them--- I use the solohealth machine at Walmart to keep track of my blood pressure.. and for kicks I use it a times to see how much the machine says that I weigh and what I actually weigh.. (today it said that I weighed at 256! I have to laugh, and say I wish!!) lol
Well folks.. be kind to yourselves.. Yes I still have very limited internet access at home, via cellphone, and here at the library...
If you have fell off the bandwagon.. do not beat yourself up.. today is a new day-- to a new you... one more holiday to go.. you can do it!!! :D
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