Well, interestingly enough...one breakthrough leads to another! Had a wonderful chat w/ the hubby again last night. Had to thank him profusely for stepping up and making me such a lovely dinner, and it all came on the heels of YET ANOTHER incredibly stressful day...but this time no meltdowns, no tears, and no people piling their crap on me as if I had somehow let them down in it all.
We talked about expectations. All kinds. From us, our marriage, to our kids, our lives together, Christmas, Food, Exercise, activities, finances, etc...
It's a good thing to get on the same page once in awhile, and just touch base that we're not running frantically thru our weeks in the total opposite direction of each other.
Then he asked me about Myself. And as we talked - it became clearer to me, that I really do want to lose these last 10 lbs or so. I just think for me, my body shape, my frame, etc.. I would feel physically better. Emotionally, I would feel like I am looking my best, I am strong physically, I am getting fit and in shape, and I am truly energetic about my everyday life. It's not a vanity thing. And it's not a pride thing either. It's just a personal choice.
I am happy with who I am right now. I am considered by most measureable standards to be at a healthy weight. (but JUST barely.) And that is 'visable' to me. When I look in the mirror, I still see that little bit that can not be denied - is fat! I am a healthy / slightly fat person. Ok, only slightly. But still. Do I really want to accept that. No, I do not. I've come to far, worked too hard, and just am not willing to settle.
But then I have rarely ever been willing to settle. And my husband knows this. I will pursue, and pursue, and pursue something that I feel is to my personal benefit - until I feel I have gotten the full benefit of whatever it is for me. I will do the work. I will teach myself whatever I need to. Just like this whole journey of learning how to treat my body, how connected my emotional health was to my lethargic uncaring overeating habits, re-learning new habits, learning the details, and the intricate details of HOW to make this method work for me - so I could achieve results. I don't give up. I don't quit. It's not who I am.
So, as we talked he asked me... So, what do YOU want to do from here? How can YOU best make this last part of this weight loss effort - totally about YOU? And how do you transition from it being about 'losing' - to being about 'your new lifestyle' - for YOU?
One day at a time...I will work towards answering those questions. I'm not totally sure really. But right now, this day... I am choosing to love myself, honor my efforts, stay within my low carb way of eating, exercise today... and take some time this evening to appreciate my day's efforts! (regardless of whether they produce any result.) Because at a minimum... these efforts are making me healthy, and strong. My physical body endures alot from me - and my family. And it sustains me while I serve all the needs of those around me, including my own.
In the end - I told my husband how I really wanted to have a 'date night' this weekend... but was a bit worried that the lowered resistance from drinking, or a cheat meal, or a spike day, or the carb cravings for the next two days after... might just be too much for me right now. He laughed, winked at me...and said, "who needs to eat on date night?"
Hope you have a great Friday! Much Love.
|
1262 kcal
|
Gras: 76,45g | Prot: 108,00g | Glu: 41,96g.
Petit Déjeuner: extra virgin olive oil (serv=1Tbsp), bacon (9AM), water (6-10 AM), hidden carbs, coffee (8oz) black, eggland's best eggs (9AM) (overeasy). Déjeuner: butter, Yam, whole green beans, boneless center cut pork. Dîner: Lite Chunky Blue Cheese Dressing, cheddar cheese, chicken gravy, cucumber, sea salted butter, fresh parm cheese (1 oz.), romaine, apple cider vinegar, water (4-6), broccoli spears, boneless chicken thighs. plus...
|
|
![](https://m.ftscrt.com/static/images/box/membersicon.gif) Commentaires
Good for you Paula. I'm so glad that you and your husband had time to really talk. It's so important. A date night is wonderful too. Just to spend some time outside of "mom, chief cook and bottle washer, limo driver, housekeeper, interior designer... etc." Go out and be his sexy, attentive, madly in love girlfriend again. And if you have a glass of wine, fine. If you don't, fine. Be in that moment... not worrying about the next one. This is your whole life, not a meal in time. XO!
28 oct. 11 par le membre: HeidiG
|
Thanks for sharing some wonderful insight. I chuckled at the "who needs to eat on a date night." Vocalizing what we want and need is so important. I am at that stage of learning to vocalize what I need. All of my life, I have helped others with what they need to the point of not taking care of what Mary needs. Wow! Your post helped me finally acknowledge what I new all along but was eating away. Thanks a million!
28 oct. 11 par le membre: Mary2270
|
So true, Heidi!!! Thank you! It's sometimes exactly how I feel... like a madly in love girlfriend! Thought about getting my hair cut and dying it another color...just because... and seeing how he likes the new me! (he's always been very playful and receptive to my odd changes along the way...) so he probably would love it! My hair is down to the middle of my back now. My profile pic was over a year and a half ago. Long Curly Hair = Shrub like Bush on the top of my shoulders! Some days I hate it!!!
28 oct. 11 par le membre: jsfantome
|
You've got a great husband Paula and, obviously, a fab marriage. And you're doing really great, balancing everything and taking care of you. For me, it's my full time weight loss/health journey and my full time plus company, clients and employees. Balance is everything I think.
28 oct. 11 par le membre: Helewis
|
Hey Mary - I'm glad you found something in this for YOU! That's what they're here for!!! Thanks for stopping by...and sharing your time and journey with me too. Much Love.
28 oct. 11 par le membre: jsfantome
|
Heather - so true. Finding the balance, and one that ever so slightly tips the metabolism into actually losing a pound...now there's the discovery I am in search of!!!! Much Love.
28 oct. 11 par le membre: jsfantome
|
28 oct. 11 par le membre: madaboutmoose
|
paula, I strive to have your attitudes :) Sometimes it seems as if we have parallel journeys.... I hope to get to the point you are at with your husband and life. You have really helped me in the past few months and I appreciate your sharing so much. It is like a beautiful light at the end of the tunnel. The struggle for the weight - that is just what shows how real it all is :) The stresses in a day - again, Ithink those are life little pinches to show you that your not dreaming... life really is this good!! :)
28 oct. 11 par le membre: esimnons
|
Eliz - you just made me laugh about a cartoon my daughter showed me. It was of a sign that reads: Due to the poor economy, high cost of utility bills, and a downsized workforce, the light at the end of the tunnel has been shut off! Indefinitely! LOL!!!! I offered to contribute to it being turned back on~ I was desperate!
28 oct. 11 par le membre: jsfantome
|
Hey - headed out to the gym, then groceries, back online after lunch...I have to finish my church group's outline for the board to review. Hope you guys have an awesome day!!! Much Love.
28 oct. 11 par le membre: jsfantome
|
All's well that ends well! And, hope not to sound like a broken record, but best of luck on that last 10 - you deserve it!
28 oct. 11 par le membre: BuffyBear
|
What a man! He's a keeper.
28 oct. 11 par le membre: sarahsmum
|
Isn't having a partner, a husband, a friend that is so supportive an awesome gift? Hope your date night is exciting and I say go for the hairstyle change! And then post a new profile pic!!!
28 oct. 11 par le membre: ctlss
|
|
|
|
|
Soumettre un Commentaire
Vous devez vous connecter pour soumettre un commentaire. Cliquez ici pour se connecter.
|
|
|
Historique de poids de jsfantome
|