I have been struggling since middle age weight gain (20 years now) in excess of 25 lbs. But then an extra 55 lbs since my husband got sick with progressive MS over 8 years ago; it was brutal. He passed away in January, 2016. My therapist told me because of the trauma and loss, to be gentle and loving to myself and not be too focused on my body image. But there are also a lot of health issues that go along with that excess weight: I am in an obese category with my BMI. In 2017 did weight watchers and Arbonne and then a weight loss clinic (with diet pills!) and excessive, expensive, obsessive and unrealistic (for me) volume of workouts and got about 35-40 lbs off. I was feeling and looking really good but then I eased off, just a little here and there, stopped weighing myself and went back to many old unhealthy eating habits ...which mostly consist of emotional comfort eating MOSTLY AT NIGHT!!! And when I get started -especially with sweet stuff: i JUST CAN'T STOP!! It is almost like I go into a trance. (YES i KNOW! THAT IS THE WORST TIME!) ANYWAY I have now gained about 25 lbs back! of the lost weight and I have tried and tried to turn it around and do this on my own. I only last a day or two and can't seem to get my traction back. I am clearly addicted to sugar and sugary products and have this mind that keeps telling me I can have just one...or that I'm not that bad off or I carry it well or whatever. Actually I do NOT carry it well... I am on meds for high cholesterol, high blood pressure and I have bone on bone arthritis in my knee and thumb. Lots of inflammatory issues. I am desperate to regain my health before I turn 60! I finally realized that this obsessive and compulsive eating is really an addictive sickness. I am ready to STOP. But I need help. I get so much inspiration from other people and always think, if they can do it, why can't I?? Hope I find the help I need here. Thanks.