Journal de suechru

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10 février 2012

Poids:	Perdu jusqu'à présent:	Reste à parcourir:	Régime suivi:
123,4 kg	0,0 kg	48,5 kg	Non Applicable

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10 mai 2011

This last semester has sucked.

Sucked in several ways, in fact. Sucked in the general sense but also sucked the life and energy right out of me. I had one class that I barely passed (and it was a stressful period as I waited between the final and the grade being posted to find that I passed.) I'm still not working, this is also stressful and there's a bunch of other crap going on that I don't want to go into here (at least right now.)

It hasn't been a good couple of months and I know I completely fell "off the wagon" so to speak. I don't want to know how much right now because I'm not ready to know or deal with it - there's too many other things on my mind right now and the last thing I need is more stress.

I'm trying to get my life back in order and that means a few different things - namely slowing down because I can't keep up the pace I was going at for most of the last year. I realize this now - okay, I probably always knew it but just kept pushing myself. I'm either taking the summer off from school or cutting down on classes dramatically (haven't officially decided which because I'm waiting to hear on a few things before I can make a good decision.)

I'm hoping forcing myself to log again will stop the stress eating I've been doing the last few months and nip some of the other maladaptive crap in the bud. We'll see.

Anyway... back, kinda. We'll see how this goes.

(1 commentaire)

02 mars 2011

I'm here... just phenomenally busy.

I have midterms and a lot due in terms of papers and such and it doesn't help that I got behind in everything due to the funk I was in for a lot of February. I'm getting things under control - and actually feeling better but am crazily swamped. Ironically, I feel a billion times better now - I swear there's something wrong with me where I really have to be busy.

I actually went to the gym in my complex tonight for the first time in months - I stuck myself on a bike mostly with a book I'm reading for school (I tried reading and doing the elliptical but I'm definitely not coordinated enough to do that, lol). Logging is going to be hit and miss until after midterms but I'll try my best.

I do feel better and I think part of it is that I spent a lot of the weekend cleaning my apartment. I'm messy to start with but I ended up buying a new vacuum and having people over on Saturday (separate events, lol) so my place is extremely clean (probably the cleanest it's been since I moved in.) Somehow cleaning my apartment seems to get the rest of my life in order for me - particularly when I go through crap and get rid of physical junk (It's like getting rid of psychic junk, I swear.) It's just so NICE to be home when it's clean and I'm not jumping over piles of stuff.

I really need to get back to this book I'm reading since I have to write a paper reviewing it for my class next week and still have a paper due Saturday (on an article I didn't read yet) and a homework assignment due Monday and another paper due Thursday (next week, not tomorrow) and I've only skimmed the data for it. No worries, I work well this way academically but I'm not going to have a lot of fun over the next week. Thankfully, the job hunting has gone into a "waiting period" so I don't have anything much to do/worry about there.

Anyway, hope my buddies are all good and hopefully I'll have some good news next week (at the very least my good news will be that midterms are over, lol!)

Affirmations for today:
1) Even if I don't have everything I want, I have a lot and I need to remember and be grateful for what I do have

2) There's good periods, there's bad periods, there's times that suck, the lesson of all it is to just keep going

3) Everything comes together at some point. Even if I can't see it right now.

(4 commentaires)

26 février 2011

I really need to stop getting sick. This week I got my second awful cold from hell in less than a month. I think it's official to say that my immune system is shot to hell from stress. Thankfully feeling a little better today but the constant barrage of illness after illness has derailed a lot of my efforts lately. I'm not making excuses, I know I COULD work out with a cold but when I have trouble breathing through my nose (like I did the earlier part of this week), all I want to do is curl up somewhere and sleep - not go walk/run/whatever

I'm actually going to ease back on a lot of stuff for the next few weeks (well, as much as I can, I still have a job interview lined up and a big pile of schoolwork to do) so my body/mind can recover from all this. I haven't been eating horrible, but I haven't logged in a while. I really need to get back into the habit of doing this at least. I guess that's just sheer laziness.

Anyway, going to finish cleaning since I have friends coming over tonight and maybe go to a coffee shop or something and work on school stuff if I have time. (Mid-terms are coming up and I have a big pile of papers to write.)

Affirmations for today:
1) No one can make you feel inferior without your consent

2) Comparisons to others serve no useful purpose

3) Nothing happens immediately, focus on now and live in the moment

(4 commentaires)

21 février 2011

I'm still here, I just... I'm not doing so great. Unemployment is really getting to me and I swear that I might go full-fledged insane if I don't find a job soon.

I'm trying to keep busy, trying to be hopeful, but I'm so stressed out that it's really not working. I just really want to hide in my bed under the covers and have everyone leave me the hell alone.

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